Usually I’m not one to fisk, because I find it tends to occupy more of my time than the fiskee is worth. But when the GDBF alerted me to this hunk of junk written by Erick Erickson at Peach Pundit, I knew a quick fisking was in order. This didn’t take long at all and I was able to accomplish it while multi-tasking at work. So here we go:
Before you go further with reading this, I’m going to add to it and make myself clear: there is a *difference* between a single parent who did not set out to be a single parent and a single parent who had every intention of being a single parent.
Which is to say: “One is BAD BAD BAD and the other is okay by me. And I am the grand arbiter of these things!!”
I *am* casting aspersions on women who run off to the sperm bank to get a baby with the expressed intention of being a single parent.
Great, but you know, maybe those women don’t give two shits what you think. It’s their body and their life after all.
There has never been a study to show it beneficial to a child to live in a single parent household. You see it frequently in minority communities and how it effects the children and the families.
Well here’s a thought: nobody exists in a vacuum. If you see it (whatever “it” is; I notice there’s no antecedent) in minority families then maybe, genius, a big part of the issue comes from the minority bit of that equation. Or is intersectional analysis too far over your head?
And now there has been a rash of articles from the New York Times to the AJC about women who want kids, but don’t want the penis to tag along.
Because nothing guarantees a life of domestic bliss like Dad’s Magical Penis™.
I’m sure glad they get all fulfilled and feel selfishly accomplished
Abandon ship! A big red flag has gone up… he’s playing the “SELFISH” card! Aaaahhhh!!!
I’m sure they feel like their children are well adapted and fine. But they aren’t. And they won’t be.
Shorter Erick: “I know better than you what’s best for you and your family.”
And I do think there should be laws prohibiting single people from adopting and I’m almost inclined to think single people should not have access to sperm banks.
Ah, nothing like appealing to The Power Of The State to impose a pre-determined family structure on its citizens. Because that’ll never backfire, no. Some “conservative.” But, it’s for the sake of the children, so I guess the iron fist of The State is okay in this case.
I sure hope like hell there is not a rash of 15 and 16 year olds getting married outside Alabama anymore!
Oh good, there’s a little regional bigotry thrown in there for extra spice.
And I think the government has a special obligation to help struggling single parents who are single parents through abandonment or death of a spouse.
Wait a minute, I thought conservatives were opposed to the (imaginary) “welfare state.” Oh well, I thought they were opposed to Big Government in general, but what do I know, clearly that perception was wrong.
But, I do think there is something seriously wrong with people who *intend* to be single parents.
Thanks for the drive-by psychology, but next time take it a little further with a diagnosis, please. At least be entertaining. It’s not like people haven’t been gnashing their teeth and rending their clothing over “single women” and assigning them all manner of psychiatric problems for over 100 years now.
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13 Responses to "Quick fisk"
All dem single womens got da vapors!
You sure you don’t mean all Dem single women?
Sorry, had to.
Anyway, if anyone has the vapors, I’m pretty sure it’s Erick.
LOL, vapors. I’m a frequent fisker, which sounds a lot dirtier than it is.
Now that you are done fisking him, make sure to wipe it on his drapes!
It’s not being a single parent that causes the “effects” on children, it’s the fucking lack of financial resources. The vast majority of single parents in this country are poor and that’s why you never see any of these studies. It’s hard to be a single parent when you’re raising 3 children on a job at Wendy’s. Women who CHOOSE to be a single parent have the resources to do it without all the financial hang-ups.
And yes, I’m assuming that the mother working at Wendy’s didn’t “choose” to become a single parent. She either a) was surprised, b) thought the Daddy was gonna help out or c) thought having a baby would bring her and the Daddy closer together and well, that didn’t turn out so well.
Well you know. To most of those fellas at Peach Pundit, poor people don’t exist. Not really.
What complete and total bullshit. How many families with abusive fathers would have been leaps and bounds better off as single parent families? And what about women who face an almost impossible choice–the daddy is gone, do I have the baby or get an abortion? I can only guess how Erick feels about that.
Some of the smartest, most well-adjusted and healthy people I know were the byproduct of single parenting. Some of the most fucked up came from traditional 2 parent families where the parents are still together. One has little to do with the other, at best. What exactly does he believe about the presence of 2 parents that makes them empirically better at raising healthy children than 1? Obviously the increased resources of 2 would be better than what most (but not all) singles can provide, but he’s not arguing for a financial threshhold for single people who want to adopt or use a sperm bank. He’s just saying they shouldn’t be able to, period.
Meanwhile, if Erick really believes that 2 parents are better than 1, I wonder how he feels about gay couples adopting? Something tells me he is looking for traditional man-woman/husband-wife/mother-father setups only. And as much as you might want the world to continue to look like the 1950s, it’s just not going to. There are always going to be single parenting situations, sometimes by death or abandonment, sometimes by the choice of dumping an abusive asshole, sometimes because one just decided to leave, sometimes because one just decided to get pregnant. And if you know they’re going to exist and nothing you can do will stop it, then WHY in god’s name wail and gnash teeth about the tiny fraction of such situations that will involve a single person going to the sperm bank? Particularly when all you’re going to do is piss off the single parents who have good reasons and the children of single parents who think you’re shitting on their family life?
Ugh. What a douchebag.
honestly, where does this guy get off? I didn’t read the original post, but did he back up anything he was saying with any research on families that are single parent by choice? The basic gist of the lit on single parents in general (generally not purposefully pursued) is that the problems attributed to the factor “single-parent” are largely not about singleness but about economic hardship. By and large, women who run off to sperm banks do so because they feel they can manage the financial burden.
twit.
also, this: “Dad’s Magical Penis™.”
hilarious!
QD:
What do you think?
…
Don’t be ridiculous. Of course he didn’t back anything up!
Sara:
Well, according to him, these women have his support and admiration. I’m sure that makes them feel so much better!! I mean, yeah, probably they’d prefer access to affordable healthcare… daycare options as working mothers… etc… but, hey, they’ve got Erick’s seal of approval, so bully for them!
Well, they’ve got his support and admiration so long as they recognize they are raising their unaborted child in an inferior single parenting situation that will just never be as good or healthy for the kid as a 2 parent situation would have been.
I’m sure if pressed he would prefer they not have had sex before marriage to begin with so that they wouldn’t be in this situation.
Right. As long as you feel guilty, ashamed, and generally bad about yourself, then it’s (sort of) acceptable!
The right does such a good job solving all these “problems” the world has.
Whatever happened to minding your own f****ing bid-ness?