I wrote this as a comment on Deb’s blog (on this post; comment currently in moderation) but wanted to repost it here as well.
I haven’t heard the term “anti-sex” very often. I *have* heard “sex-negative” fairly frequently (and I use it myself on a regular basis) and when I *have* heard “anti-sex,” it seems that the meaning is intended to be the same as “sex-negative.” That is, it’s not about whether a particular individual does or does not like sex. That’s not even part of the argument. Instead, it’s about the way sexuality is regulated in our society, so that only certain expressions of sexuality are considered acceptable. And who most often suffers because of these constraints? You got it: women, queer folks, trans folks, people with disabilities. If we “stray from the path” - to use your very appropriate blog title! - we are punished. We are suddenly outside the scope of what is acceptable, and therefore *wrong* or even seen as inhuman in some cases (e.g., sex workers). Sex-positivity is about embracing *all* expressions of sexuality and decentering the male-centric, heteronormative stereotypes of sexuality. I’ve collected some good reference links on the matter here, that explain it much better than my fumbling attempt!
Occasionally I like to just go back and re-read some of those posts I’ve collected on my Sex-Positive Reference page. And when I do, I always come away with the question hanging heavily in the air: how could anyone who identifies as feminist not be sex-positive?
Look at this bit from Amanda Holloway, for example:
I believe that being in control of one’s sexual self involves having access to information that allows for informed decision making. I also believe that it involves access to the medical treatments and technology –from condoms to regular Pap smears to Gardasil to abortion procedures – that put women in charge of their bodies. I believe in sexual self-determination, that each person has a right to determine who she will be intimate with, and in what context, without being judged for her choices or forced into others. I believe that being in control of one’s sexual self is an integral part of autonomous adulthood, and until women are given the right to control our sexual selves we will continue to be treated like children in this paternalistic society.
How could any feminist not support these goals? (And as I’ve said before, I think the idea of being sex-positive and not being feminist is a contradiction in terms. To be sex-positive is to be feminist. To two are so inherently wed that to try to separate them makes no sense to me.) And, really: how could ANYONE not support these goals?
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3 Responses to "Sex-positive / sex-negative / anti-sex"
If I wasn’t supremely busy this weekend, I’d be writing about why it is that I find sex a subject worth writing about.
Wow, that sounds convoluted. But yes, I think that being sex positive should damn well include feminism, and if it doesn’t, then it’s not actually sex positivity, it’s selfishness.
I was listening to an old Susie Bright podcast the other day while walkin’ the dog, and started thinking about the importance of sex in people’s lives, yet again. Then today I picked up a Vanity Fair from a few months ago (the one with Bobby Kennedy on the cover) and read an opinion piece on politicians and sex. Seems like the world is tempting me again.
But yes, and I agree with you on the anti-sex part too.
The crazy thing is, these points are alluded to in one of the great Radical Feminist works, Shulamith Firestone’s “Dialectic of Sex”. Although she’s a bit questionable on LGBT issues, the basic philosophy is certainly there in nascent form.
I quite agree: how can anyone be feminist and not sex-positive?
Amber, I honestly think said feminist muster all the strength they have to not support these goals. It doesn’t take much sense to realize that these are feminist goals, no rocket science required. But they twist and warp their minds to the point where they do need rocket science to realize that their goals concerning sex are the ones out of line with feminist concerns, not ours.
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