Being Amber Rhea

Quick rant against regional bias

I’m busy w/ work so I’m just going to dash this off. A few weeks ago Creative Loafing had this story about Atlantans who moved to New York, and what they thought of NYC. I didn’t read it, but in this week’s (or I guess now it’s last week’s) Creative Loafing they had letters responding to it. There was one that was thanking them for running it bc the person said they get sick and tired of hearing the self-righteous assholes who move to Atlanta from cities in the North and talk about “You have no culture, you don’t know good food, you’re not educated, blah blah blah.” Then there was a letter by one of those assholes! It was doing everything the previous letter had said – telling Southerners we have no culture, telling us we deserve to be made fun of by the rest of the country. GOD! Fuck those people! I am so SICK of shit like that! And it’s always from people who describe themselves as progressive and liberal, too. Guess what… even if you’re right about some of it (not saying you are or aren’t, but let’s just put it out there for the sake of argument) it doesn’t matter because you’re being a complete tool about it! Bias against the South remains an acceptable form of bias among progressives and I’m fucking sick of it. It is NOT OKAY. Own your shit before you point fingers, assholes.

New video episode of Mostly ITP

Here’s the latest video episode of Mostly ITP, chronicling our road trip last weekend and talking about why we do these road trips in general. It’s longer than we would typically make these videos, but we wanted to experiment a little, so that’s why.

I haven’t actually watched it yet because Rusty finished editing it late last night, and I don’t have sound on my work computer. But I had already seen the first ~half or so, and besides, I know it’s going to be good no matter what!

New blog, and a brief Southern reflection

My good friend Miss Debris Blanche has moved to Wordpress.com, with a new blog name, a new layout – and, I believe, a first post that should win a prize for “best first post.”

In addition to just being hilarious and a great writer, she does a good job of putting into words an approximation of why I love the South:

So, why haven’t I left yet??? I guess b/c, for better or worse, it’s my home. There is a special vein of insanity in the South that can’t be duplicated. The city I live in has a law on the books requiring everyone to own a handgun. And, for some reason, a great number of Southerners enjoy Civil War re-enactment — I guess so they can lose over and over and over again!

On the other hand, we have the best food, (many of) the best writers, and (many of) the best bands/musicians (such as R.E.M., the B-52’s, Ray Charles and James Brown … and the Allman Brothers, if that’s your thing).

This is a very friendly, hospitable place, yet it’s also an incredibly warped and haunted place. Love it or leave it, they say … if the right opportunity arose, I might go. (Though I’d probably come back eventually!) But in the meantime, it makes great copy, and maybe, just maybe, us thinkin’ folk who stay behind can keep fighting the good fight and help drag our homeland into the 21st century. Even if it’s as small a start as being able to buy a 6-pack at Kroger on Sunday.

This is something I’ve found hard to convey to non-Southerners, and so I’ve taken the tack of saying, “If you’re not from the South, you don’t get it.” Now I can just point people to this description!

I’ll bemoan certain aspects of the South from time to time – and believe me, there is plenty worth bemoaning – but whenever I hear someone who isn’t from here talking about the South this and the South that, I can get pretty vitriolic. (Like the friend who started pontificating about “What I don’t like about the South is…” sophomore year at NYU, until I stopped him and asked, “Have you ever been to the South?” Yeah, I think you can figure out what his answer was.) I guess it’s like, if you have siblings, you can make fun of your siblings but nobody else better dare.

One difference between the excerpt above, though, and my feeling on the matter: the opportunity has arisen, and I did leave, and I came back – twice. And I never want to leave again. This is my home, and when I was away, I missed something that I hadn’t even realized I valued. I ran to New York after high school, and really, can you blame me? 18 years in Augusta was rough, to use a wild understatement. And that year and a half at NYU was a wonderful experience that I wouldn’t trade for anything. I wouldn’t know Dacia if it weren’t for that, or a few other friends who, admittedly, I mainly keep in touch with via Facebook these days. I probably would’ve stayed at NYU for the whole four years if money and other life circumstances hadn’t intervened, and I wonder what my life would be like now if I’d done that?

-But anyway, not to get off on a tangent… the time when I really felt a seering homesickness was when I lived in Texas. Granted, I had other really difficult stuff going on at the time, but I don’t think Dallas and I were ever meant for each other. My one consolation, as silly as it might sound now, was sweet tea from the Chick-Fil-A on the other side of Central Expressway. And for as much as I used to hate on Atlanta when I’d never even really been here before, isn’t it hilarious (and ironic?) that this place feels more like home to me than anywhere else ever has.

Can’t say I care for the Allman Brothers, though!

Because I want to

I’m in a photo mood lately. Here are some more photos of good times, this time all featuring people (instead of just a shadow). My mom always admonishes me by saying, “Now don’t forget to get pictures of yourself!”
(more…)

Random retrospective

Sometimes I like to just go back through my Flickr photostream and remember fun and interesting times past. And since I’m nearing 5,000 photos (I’ll never catch up with Josh!) it seems like as good a time as any to post some of my favorites.

So have a look! You can click on each one to go to the Flickr page with more info, because I don’t feel like writing captions for them.
(more…)

Vignette

Every time I hear the Kid Rock song “Cowboy,” at the part where he says, “Get thrown in the mix and tossed out of bars,” I think, “No, you mean Waffle Houses.”

Digging for personal history – part 1 of…?

In my wrap-up post about our road trip, I mentioned doing research on family history. So here’s what that’s about.

I’ve heard references over the years to “the house in Columbia” – most often from my grandmother, and sometimes from my mom. And while reminiscing and/or telling a story for the umpteenth time, sometimes Gran would exclaim, “I know I have a picture of that house! I wish I could find it!” (So far, she hasn’t.)

I don’t remember when exactly I became more than passively interested in this house. I’ve always enjoyed the feel of old buildings; and as long as I’ve known that the field existed, I’ve been interested in historic preservation. So, years and years ago I asked what happened to the house, and when Gran and/or Mom said it had been torn down, I accepted it with a sigh and chalked it up to another casualty of so-called “urban renewal.”

There was never anything more than that to the story, and I never thought much about it. But recently I’ve become determined to piece together the missing years between 1969 and today. It was during those years, of course, that the house met its sad fate.
(more…)

That’s the Beltline, under there

There’s kind of a lot of kudzu behind our apartment building:

Ah, Georgia. Even in the middle of the city, the kudzu will not be thwarted.

So about that anti-South bias…

Here’s a perfect example of what I was talking about.

Totally inexcusable. But I’m not surprised. Frankly, I don’t understand how so many people are apparently not seeing through the bullshit of so-called “lefty” bloggers. Kos and countless others have shown their asses many times over wrt sexism and racism. And now, what’s this? Wonkette regionally biased? Knock me over with a feather!

The mask is off, and it’s been off for a long time now.

[Via Going Through the Motions]

Regional bias

Rusty already wrote about this on his blog, but there are a few things I’d like to say on the topic, as well. Not sure how long this post will be, because a lot of what I want to say, I’m not sure how to translate from the gobbledy-gook in my head to the written word.

I’m no stranger to anti-South bias, especially given the fact that when you spend a lot of your time online, you naturally encounter people from all over. Offline too, there’s plenty of it… I vividly reminder one time, sophomore year of college at NYU, a friend of mine launched into this diatribe that started with, “What I don’t like about the South is…” and he started rattling off a bunch of stereotypes. I stopped him and asked if he’d ever been to the South. He hadn’t. I tore him a bit of a new asshole, he admitted he was behaving like a presumptuous jerk, and we went to dinner.

So anyway, I know that stuff is out there. It bugs me, but not on a daily basis. But in recent months/weeks/days, it’s become a bit more pronounced in my vicinity.

Take PodCamp NYC, for example. I detected a fair amount of anti-South bias – the most egregious example, of course, being the guy who came up to Rusty and me and started a sentence with, “I don’t want to pre-judge, BUT…” – at which time, he proceeded to pre-judge like a mofo. He asked if since we were in Georgia, most of our podcasts were about personal stories and stuff (from “military spouses,” among others), not world events. He didn’t seem to think there was anything fucked-up about that question, and even seemed to be a bit amused with himself. There we were, real live dumb Georgia hicks for him to talk at!! Maw, get the skillet!

Then there was the cab driver who took us to the airport Sunday morning, who said “I don’t care about the South” and “I don’t like the South because it’s too slow.” Okay, first of all, the South is a pretty big region – even if you’ve never been here, wouldn’t you venture a guess that it’s not all completely the same? Secondly, just who the fuck does this guy think he is?

So those are two very in-your-face examples. But there was also plenty of it running just beneath the surface. That, of course, is the type that’s the most insidious, because you can’t point your finger at one specific thing and say, “See?? Bias!!”

I’ve had the feeling, for a while now, that PodCamp Atlanta wasn’t taken as seriously among the PodCamp elite (whatever that means, but bear with me) because it was, well, in Atlanta. My intuition is rarely wrong on perceptions like these, so I think it’s worth mentioning, at least. Never mind what a completely kick-ass event we had, full of energy and passion, with overwhelmingly positive reviews, not to mention making national news. It’s the South; so, obviously, not quite as good. (Or, I imagine, something along those lines.)

I want to be clear: this isn’t an accusation. It’s a statement of how I’ve felt, of perceptions I’ve had, and things I’ve picked up on; little things, here and there. Not that it’ll stop me/us from making my/our voice(s) heard. But it is… annoying, nonetheless.

Now, as for anti-South bias on a broader (ie, not just PodCamp-related) scale?

It’s possible to make observations about certain institutions of the South without reducing individuals to stereotypes. This is exactly the kind of thing we’ve talked about on some of the feminist blogs lately: critique and analyze the structure/issue; don’t make presumptions about individuals, sight unseen.

And, it’s very telling to me when self-identified progressives get squirrely about this WRT the South. I’ve seen some people practically fall over themselves to defend their prejudice. Because apparently this kind of prejudice is okay. (Reminds me of how quickly the mask comes off with some self-identified progressives when they’re called on racist or sexist behavior.)

No – it’s not okay.
And I/we/you should not have to put up with it as some kind of nebulous atonement, which is what the justification typically is.

… More to come, when Rusty and I record our next “talkie” podcast. For some reason, this is one of those issues that I can talk about more effectively when speaking rather than writing.