Being Amber Rhea

ETA: Now the title doesn’t make sense, because I changed my mind and got rid of the bullets.

Part of why I’m on the fence about BlogHer Atlanta? Well, aside from the $100 entry fee (which is totally fine of them to charge; I am NOT being one of those people who complains about anything that’s not totally free at the expense of someone else’s hard work), there’s also the fact that I’m just over a lot of these conferences.

Rusty and I talked about why on a podcast a while ago. They’ve become commercialized, but that’s not even the word. Cartoonized, maybe? Firefox spellcheck doesn’t know that word (but then it doesn’t know “spellcheck” either) but I think it’s the most apt. If I hear the word “conversation” again I may puke.

And I’m really not trying to be one of those too-cool-for-school assholes who blogs about why blogging sucks, or that kind of thing. I HATE that!

But look, here’s the truth. In addition to the cartoony, sales-pitchy bullshit, I don’t feel welcome at these conferences. With rare exception, I never really have - it just took me a while to admit it to myself, I guess. The BlogSavannah experience was a breakthrough, of course, but there have been so many other instances that I’ve lost count.

When you talk about sex, and you’re a woman, and you’re a tech geek, and you (gasp!) also talk about things other than sex (because OMG, people who aren’t ashamed about sex do other things in their lives, too)… well, let’s just say it doesn’t add up to a good combination, with a lot of people. There are some awesome people, sure. But they don’t tend to be the majority at these conferences. Which is one reason I created Sex 2.0 - to bring all those people together and none (or, well, very few) of the sucky ones!

Sometimes I wonder how much of me not feeling welcome is an accurate perception of reality, and how much is self-induced. Then I remember how good I am at reading people and situations, and that my intuition is almost always spot on, and that I always doubt it anyway, because somehow that seems like the proper thing to do (surely we must consider all angles, surely!) and heaven forfend, I would appear “selfish” if I didn’t.

I remember the guy guffawing at BarCamp Atlanta about Sex 2.0. I remember the stupid, predictable, un-funny, adolescent-level jokes. BarCamp Atlanta pretty much sucked all around, but that’s the stuff that stands out the most in my memory. Oh, and the hooker jokes. Those fucking guys joking about going down to 11th street and finding the hookers.

Here’s a secret. When you make a hooker joke - whoever you are - I hate you, right then and there. Even if generally, rationally, I know that most of the time you’re a “good person” - whatever that even means. When you do that, I hate you, and my eyes want to seer through you.

Oh and back to being a woman who talks about sex (bullet point above). Sometimes people seem incredulous that it’s still such a “big deal.” I want to ask where the fuck they’ve been, anyway. Last week, at Manuel’s, I overheard that conversation at the table behind us, carried on by supposed friends-of-friends. I didn’t know these people, but it didn’t matter. I’ve heard a million conversations like it before. Quote: “She was really weird, she talked about sex all the time.” Quote: “Yeah, I mean she was a total weirdo… she said if we went to this party, we’d be expected to have sex in front of people!” Just shove a dagger through my chest already. We’re back to square one.

Well, I should probably wrap it up and try to get some sleep. I feel very restless, but we’re going to Radial for breakfast, so I need to get my butt to bed.

One last thing - I feel the need to say here, too, that Elisa Camahort is awesome and I’m not trying to trash BlogHer or anything like that. I had so much fun hanging out with her at ConvergeSouth - she is just a nice, cool, down-to-earth person. And look at the super cool slide she made!

In an email thread with potential organizers of next year’s Sex 2.0, I said something that I felt was worth reposting here, as it kind of gives a basic idea of what my “vision” was with Sex 2.0. It can also be extrapolated to other causes/events/etc.

In response to Match’s question:

3. Did the conf pay for travel/boarding for any speakers?

I answered:

You’re funny! Unless you count Dacia staying at my place, nope.

On the one hand I wish we could’ve, but that would’ve taken a shit-ton more money than I even dreamed of being able to raise. I do feel very strongly that people deserve to be paid for their hard work, including speaking, presentations, etc. - and I resent the fact that oftentimes in “progressive” circles, it’s taken as a given that people will do things “pro bono,” or they’re seen as greedy or somehow bad if they expect compensation for their efforts.

On the other hand, since fundamentally this was an unconference, setting up a hierarchy of “speaker” vs. “not-speaker” defeats the purpose. There was no call for papers. Sessions did not have to be pre-approved. Basically if somebody wanted to lead a session, they said so, and sent me a description and I posted it on the web site. It was first come, first served.

So I would caveat my first statement (”on the one hand”) by pointing out that those expectations are reasonable in some circumstances and not in others. I feel like w/ Sex 2.0, there’s a real spirit of community and all of us working for a greater good - and recognizing that we DON’T get a lot of funding, bc we have to fight tooth and nail for what little we get bc of the stigma. I feel like there was passion behind Sex 2.0 that I’ve rarely seen elsewhere.

Y’all certainly don’t have to structure it as an unconference next year if you don’t want to. Seriously, you can and should do whatever you want! Personally I think the unconference model works for Sex 2.0 in maintaining and fostering the sex commons that Elizabeth Wood spoke about. To me it makes sense for Sex 2.0 to be a space for non-hierarchical, collaborative learning. We all have things to teach and things to learn.

Finally, I will caveat THAT by saying that while I really enjoy the unconference model, I think if taken too far it descends into unmanageable chaos. I’ve had a few people lecture me on why I shouldn’t call Sex 2.0 an unconference, since it doesn’t use the “open space” model. I think these people are, quite simply, assholes - and I welcome them to run their own sex conference if they’re so full of bright ideas. I just think asking people to travel across the country without SOME idea of what to expect in terms of sessions, participants, etc. is unrealistic. I think it works best to strike a balance between the two extremes - build a general framework of expectations, and let the content grow organically.

Sex 2.0 was last weekend, and I think people are finally starting to come down from the post-orgasmic bliss state that characterized last week’s tweets, blog posts, emails, etc. (On a less pleasant note, I have yet to shake this case of con crud.)

A few days ago, I posted a big round-up of what other people had to say about the conference; but I have yet to post my reactions. So here are a few.

First of all, simply the fact that all of last week seemed like a post-orgasmic bliss-like state - and Twitter was a downright lovefest - is testament to Sex 2.0’s huge success. I had hoped for it to be successful, bring people together, foster community, blah blah blah… but it really did all that and more in a way that exceeded my wildest dreams. I am so pleased!

The only complaint I heard was that there were too many interesting sessions going on at once! I lost count of the number of people who told me they wished it had been two days.

Dacia and I were talking about how one thing that was unique about Sex 2.0 was that people seemed to be more interested in actually talking and interacting face-to-face, rather than obsessively documenting the event via liveblogging, photos, Twitter, etc. Don’t get me wrong, all of those things were going on; but it definitely was a different vibe than any other social media-related conference I’ve been to. People were so interested and engaged in the discussions, that they couldn’t be bothered to stop and pick up their iPhones. And to me that’s what it’s all about! Social media should foster the social, after all.

Also - and this might seem paradoxical to the last point, but it’s really not - instead of just talking about the various social media tools available, people were actually using the tools to create original content and do cool things. Whether it was showing people how social media can help sex workers form an online community for real-world activism, or role-playing the ups and downs of being internet famous (I’m still annoyed with myself for not going to Melissa’s session), this conference was about doing and not just being meta. Several people were inspired to create new blogs or other social media projects last weekend, and I look forward to seeing how they develop.

Overall, I believe it was the combination of strong content, the energy of the people there, and the comfort of being in a judgment-free space that created Sex 2.0’s unique heights of awesomeness. There are already plans in the works for next year; I love to see this excitement! The consensus seems to be that it will be in DC next year. Sounds good to me… I’ll see y’all there!

…a.k.a., the One True Wrap-up Post To Rule Them All.

Live-blogging

• Ellie Lumpesse
• Funky Brown Chick
• Viviane’s Sex Carnival

A sampling of wrap-up posts

• village voice sex naked city - Sex 2.0 Brings the Internet’s Sex Nerds to Atlanta - Dacia’s Sex 2.0 video on Naked City TV
• Sex Trade: Sex conference brings bloggers together to Twitter about getting laid - Melissa’s wrap-up on Valleywag
• Renegade Evolution: Sex 2.0, the Awesome & the Suck - Ren’s truly comprehensive wrap-up of Sex 2.0! (”The Suck” refers to her being stuck in the airport.)
• Radical Georgia Moderate » Sex 2.0 exceeded my expectations - Rusty’s wrap-up post.

Many more Sex 2.0-related blog posts are saved in my del.icio.us, and I’ll be updating with more as I find them.

I’ll also be checking Technorati periodically. If you write something Sex 2.0-related, please remember to tag it “sex20″ so it’ll get picked up by Technorati!

Other links

• Outline of Audacia Ray’s keynote
• Sex 2.0 “sex commons” forum on Sex in the Public Square, where participants in Elizabeth’s session (or anyone, really!) can continue the discussion begun at the conference.

People who were Twittering at Sex 2.0

• amberlrhea
• audaciaray
• cunningminx
• debrisblanche
• elizabethSITPS
• ellie_lumpesse
• eternal42
• funkybrownchick
• furrygirl
• inaradeluna
• Jennagain
• jbrotherlove
• kimberleecline
• melissagira
• misstreah
• MistressMaeve
• museumfreak
• peacetara
• playwithmatch
• raquelita
• reginalynn
• rustytanton
• SakuraSarashi
• SFEley
• Starre
• subnouveau
• tiffanybbrown
• tmoenk
• viviane212

All tweets from people who used the #sex20 hashtag are at http://twemes.com/sex20.

I took screenshots of some of my favorite tweets. (I certainly missed some, because there were over 1,000 tweets, y’all.)

More screenshots here.

Photographic evidence

Of course, there is a Sex 2.0 Flickr group. Currently it’s invite-only, to keep away prying/creepy eyes. If you want to join so you can add photos, there’s a “request invitation” link (or something like that, I don’t know what the exact text is) that you can click, and I’ll add you.

—

Thanks to everyone who came to Sex 2.0 and made it a truly amazing event!! The only complaints I’ve heard about it were that there were too many awesome sessions going on at once so it was hard to decide where to go, so I consider that a success!

There’s already energy for doing it again next year… how about in Washginton, DC this time? That seems to be the growing consensus. (Maeve, I would totally be down with Burlington, VT too, if you can find a venue!)

Thanks again, y’all. It was a wonderful weekend.

[Cross-posted on the Sex 2.0 blog, natch]

I’ve been trying to decide whether or not I want to be the main organizer of PodCamp Atlanta again in 2008. Lately, I’m leaning toward ‘no.’

Being in charge of the first PodCamp Atlanta was exhilarating and I wouldn’t change anything about it. But I think this time around, someone else should be in charge and put their own spin on it.

Since I scheduled both of them, I’ve known for months about PodCamp Atlanta ’08’s proximity to Sex 2.0. People have asked, “Can you do that?” Sure, I can. But the more important question to me now is, do I want to? Because if PodCamp starts to feel at all like an obligation instead of something fun, then I know I shouldn’t be the one leading the effort.

When PodCamp Atlanta ‘07 was in the planning stages, the social media climate (god, did I just use the phrase “social media climate?”) in the Southeast was different from what it is now. It was very nascent at that time (in terms of events, that is; not in terms of how many people were blogging or whatever). SoCon07 was being planned at the same time, and was held in February 2007, as Atlanta’s first social media conference. Since then, there have been tons of other events and gatherings. There’s no shortage of people in this city who could easily lead the PodCamp effort in ‘08.

One thing I know about myself is, I have a history of taking on too much and cleaning up the mess if other people drop the ball. And it takes a toll on me, physically and emotionally. I don’t want to be put into high-stress mode come April of next year, when what I should be doing is celebrating and having fun.

Sex 2.0 is where my heart and soul is, and that’s where I want to focus my energy. Obviously, I will happily be involved with PodCamp, just as I will happily be involved with any social media coolness in the Atlanta area. To whomever ends up taking PodCamp and running with it, I’ve got a collection of great quotes about PodCamp ‘07 that can be used on promotional materials for next year, including Julie Squires saying, “PodCamp Atlanta changed my life.” That’s sure to rope in some sponsor dollars! :)

Saturday Keynote: Changing Your World with Blogs

It’s the second day of ConvergeSouth (and the first day that Rusty and I will be here for the entire day). Sue Polinsky is introducing Elisa Camahort, and I’m going to attempt to live-blog it, until my MacBook battery dies, anyway. Sue is saying there aren’t a lot of women bloggers with “credentials,” so it’s hard to fill panels with women. I disagree… there are tons of women bloggers with all kinds of credentials out there. Next Sue said, “Or maybe we just don’t know about them.” That’s more like it!

9:17 a.m. - Elisa points out that they had 136 women speakers at BlogHer ‘07.

9:21 a.m. - Blogging is good for your health, because of the connections you make. Elisa cites the example of Millie Garfield’s blog.

Blogging (and podcasting) offers us the opportunity to have a record of our lives, our parents’ lives, and our grandparents’ lives that we never had before. Elisa says she wishes she’d had an opportunity to record her grandmother’s story before she died.

9:26 a.m. - What’s the definition of a blog? If someone is an active commenter but doesn’t have their own blog, are they a blogger? What about Twitter, or Facebook? The definition of what it means to be a blogger is changing and evolving, because it’s all about the community that forms.

9:32 a.m. - Elisa addresses the (sometimes flip) sentiment, “Do what you love and the money will follow.” So what’s wrong w/ making money from your blogging endeavors, if you can? Blogs are changing the way we do business.

Now Elisa is talking about Chloe Spencer, “teen pro-blogger.”

9:36 a.m. - Elisa disagrees w/ what a lot of tech bloggers say, that unless you have a very specific niche, it’s hard to build an audience. She says it’s about having a unique voice and a way of telling your personal story that makes people laugh, nod their heads, or just be interested. I agree.

9:40 a.m. - Is it going to be harder to make a living via blogs as the blogosphere becomes more saturated? Elisa is talking about Elise Bauer of Simply Recipes, who makes six figures per year from her blog. Of course, the part people don’t mention as much is that Elise started her blog four years ago when there were maybe ten food bloggers, and now there are tens of thousands.

Other people are using blogs to move their careers forward in other ways - not just making money via ads on their blog. Example: Megan Garnhum got her dream job w/ WeeWorld after she was inspired to do something she loves (write a blog about shopping) which made her visible and gave her her own playing field. That visibility got her recognized by WeeWorld, where she now works.

9:47 a.m. - Politicians are starting to realize that they ignore people outside the political blogosphere at their peril. (Answer to rhetorical question of why did Elizabeth Edwards come to BlogHer ‘07 even though it was not a huge media opportunity for her?)

9:51 a.m. - Example of blogs impacting real-world action: Grace Davis started a Katrina relief blog after a woman in Mississippi posted on Craigslist that she could drive around to different shelters in Mississippi, but didn’t know how to get the word out; all she had was her car and her cell phone. Grace called this woman and said she’d start a blog. The woman in Mississippi then would call Grace and tell her what shelter she was at, its address, how many people were there, and what they needed. People would see it on the blog and ship directly to the shelters. Because of this blog, supplies were getting to the shelters before FEMA.

9:57 a.m. - Guy in the audience says he thinks people in their 20’s and early 30’s don’t need face-to-face connection. I spoke up, of course. Heh.

As a nice on-point epilogue, Elisa used Rusty and me as an example! ‘Cause you know, we met via reading our blogs, and look at us now.

Last weekend, Rusty and I attended BarCamp Atlanta. I’m glad Jeff took the time and effort to pull the event together. And this is no reflection on him personally, but I’d be lying if I wrote an effusive post about what a great time it was for me.

I’m used to being a minority at tech conferences. Let’s face it: most tech conferences are, still, major sausage parties. Being one of a small number of women doesn’t make me uncomfortable, because I’ve never experienced anything different; it’s the norm (even though it shouldn’t be).

And, too, sausage parties though they may be, the guests at those parties are also individuals. Many of whom are pretty nifty folks. One’s gender is only a portion of one’s identity, after all.

But sometimes, there’s just a confluence of many factors (a propensity toward homogeny in several areas being a major one) that creates a really bad, uncomfortable situation.

On the way home after day one of BarCamp, Rusty and I were discussing different kinds of “uncomfortable.” I remembered reading, via Technorati, a few male bloggers’ wrap-ups of the BlogHer conference, where they said they felt uncomfortable because there were so few men there.

That’s one kind of uncomfortable. That’s uncomfortable as in, “I’m in a situation that’s new to me and I’m trying to figure it out.” (As a side note, one might use the particular BlogHer situation as an opportunity to reflect on how men being the majority at tech conferences as the default is fucked-up.)

There’s another kind of uncomfortable, though, and that’s what I felt at BarCamp. I’m not sure if I’d call it a feeling of physical danger, because I think that’s too simplistic. The fact that I’m having trouble coming up with the words to accurately convey what I felt annoys me, but I’m willing to bet there are other women out there who know exactly what I’m talking about. (This feeling is not confined to tech conferences, of course!)

Right off the bat, grown men were making unoriginal, sophomoric jokes about Sex 2.0; that should help set the scene a bit. I refuse to tolerate that crap and I’m certainly not going to pretend to laugh at something that I’ve heard fifty times before and wasn’t funny the first time. I expect adults to act like adults, and I won’t tolerate any apologists who inevitably come around with justifications about, “Well, they don’t know any better” and “Well, that’s the society we live in” etc. Bullshit. People raise to the expectations set for them, and if expectations for adults are perpetuated at a 7th grade level, nothing ever changes.

Then there were the assholes talking about going out to the liquor store, and one of them added, “There might be hookers out there, too!” They were only a few feet away from me, and there were so many things I could’ve said to them. But I did not have the energy to get into a pointless, fruitless fight, expending my energy while they expend none of theirs.

I don’t know where I’m ultimately going with this post. I do know that I wanted to get this out there and not hide it or pretend it’s “not a big deal.” Because it IS a big deal, and I won’t self-censor or be silenced. I want to support the local tech/social media community, but I expect that community to support all its members. And I know that’s possible - I saw it happening at PodCamp Atlanta (which had an impressive degree of diversity across many areas), SoCon07, and in many other spaces.

If any guys are tempted to leave a comment saying they didn’t get that feeling at all from BarCamp - calm your itchy fingers and re-read my post. Because that’s the entire point.

I was glad to see Dave, Tim, Vic, Tiffany (one of a total of six women!), and Jeff at BarCamp. If the whole thing had been as awesome as the parts where Rusty and I were hanging out with them, I wouldn’t be writing this. Here’s to next year.

BarCamp Atlanta starts tonight, about an hour from now. Apparently we’ll be having dinner on the top level of a parking deck. Swanky!

I have no idea what to expect from BarCamp, but I’m looking forward to finding out. This will be my first hardcore, totally purist unconference (as in, no pre-planned schedule). I’ll try to do as much liveblogging (or pseudo-liveblogging) as possible and take lots of photos.

Kudos to Jeff Haynie for putting this together!

This post will be an amalgamation of emails…

First, I received this email from Chris Brogan:

I might have venue space for a PodCamp Atlanta on Dec 5-6. Weekday timeframe, so I know it might draw different, or might not work out for you. What do you think?

I replied that I would be out of town Dec. 6-7, and that I’m currently too overloaded with other projects at the moment to take on anything else, but that it sounds like a good idea and if people are interested, we should try to do it. (A weekday timeframe isn’t great for me personally, because I work during the week, but I think the fact that it would draw a different crowd makes it an interesting idea.) So I sent this email to the Atlanta Podcasters Google group and the PodCamp Atlanta Google group:

See note below from Chris Brogan. The location is Cobb Galleria. I think doing a “mini” PodCamp Atlanta would be cool; however, I’m going to be out of town on Dec. 6th, and have a lot going on between now and then, so I really cannot commit to being the organizer. If anyone else is interested in seeing this happen, please reply ASAP. I will forward names of those interested to Chris.

The only responses I received were two terse emails which basically dismissed the entire idea out of hand.

Today I emailed both groups again:

Okay, well, so far, the only responses I’ve gotten have been two people saying they don’t think a mid-week PodCamp would work. (Which I take to mean, *they* wouldn’t come to a mid-week PodCamp. Whether anyone else would come is another matter entirely, but I’ve not received any other input.) I still think it would be a good idea and a worthy experiment, if nothing else; but like I said, I am not able to take on the task of single-handedly organizing it right now. So, I’ll give it until the end of this week for someone else to volunteer to handle things (it wouldn’t be a ton of work, if you’re on the fence) and if no one speaks up, then we’ll just nix the idea of a December mini-PodCamp Atlanta.

Frankly, I think it would not be a big deal to do this and make it very hardcore BarCamp-style. That is, no advance planning of sessions, people just show up and propose sessions the day of, and then see where things go. Get your own food, no T-shirts or other fancy schwag, just people hanging out and sharing good ideas and conversation. (Side note: if I hear the word “conversation” used to describe the ethos of social media one more time, I think I might vomit.) Brogan seems to think there needs to be more advance organizing than that, and generally I would be inclined to agree, since I don’t like leaving stuff up to chance - it makes me nervous and sometimes physically ill. But I think that if this is a “mini” PodCamp, there’s no need to go overboard. But he’s apparently not comfortable doing it without something a little more formal. And I can understand that.

So if any of y’all are interested, please speak up ASAP. Otherwise, I hope you’ll still plan to participate in the next full-on PodCamp Atlanta, which is scheduled for May 17-18, 2008. (And I will need a lot of planning assistance with that, so consider this your heads-up!)

If interested, comment here, email one of the groups, and/or email me directly. Thanks.

I’m presenting at ConvergeSouth, a little less than one month from now. My session is called “Podcasting and Beyond.” I think the ConvergeSouth people gave it that name; or else I did and just don’t remember. Anyway, I want to focus on the “beyond” aspect, rather than getting tied up in boring technical details and talking about the pros and cons of various audio editors (I hate talking about that kind of shit) and explaining what an RSS feed is, and such. But “beyond” is pretty broad, so if you’re going to be there and have an opinion about what the general theme of the session should be, let me know.

ConvergeSouth is an unconference, so it’s not like I’ll be yakking the whole time. I plan to talk for like 5-10 minutes at the beginning, and then just do the open-ended discussion thing; but even with an open-ended discussion, you need some kind of unifying theme.

Share your thoughts!

This October will mark the third ConvergeSouth unconference, which I believe (and don’t quote me on this, ’cause I might be wrong) was the first new media unconference in the South. Rusty and I were there last year and it proved to be the gateway drug for what’s developed into an unconference addiction on our part; we’ll be back for another fix this year, and this time, I’m a presenter.

I’ll be leading a session titled “Podcasting and Beyond,” scheduled for 1:00-2:00 (I think; the schedule is a little hard to read) on Saturday, October 20. It’s listed as a how-to session, but I don’t plan to get too deep into the nuts-and-bolts of the technical side of podcasting. If people want an Audacity demo, we can do that before or after; but in unconference fashion, I would like this to be more of a discussion about what the “beyond” is. If you’ll be at ConvergeSouth, let me know if you have any ideas of what you’d like to see in this session!

Also, for any of y’all who are handy with a digicam, ConvergeSouth will have a film festival component this year. In particular, several local folks come to mind for the Citizen Journalism category:

We are looking for self-produced videos that are newsworthy stories. Can be but not limited to stories about historic events, local politics, corporate accountability, personal documentary, current events and similar. No more than 15 minutes in length.

Submit your videos by September 25!

I’m very excited, because Sex 2.0 plans are progressing nicely!

We now have a confirmed venue, which means we have an idea of how much money we need to raise; which means we can start contacting sponsors! Sex 2.0 will take place April 12, 2008 at the Spring4th Center.

Rusty is going to write a press release tonight or this weekend, and then we can use that, along with bios and such, to put together a media kit to send to potential sponsors. I already have several local companies/organizations in mind that I’d like to approach. Other people will be in charge of approaching sponsors elsewhere (and with helping me approach them here, because really, this is something I definitely cannot do on my own).

We have four sessions nailed down; and there will be more, many more! The fabulous Audacia Ray is also confirmed as the keynote speaker.

If you have an idea for a session, please add it to the sessions page on the wiki; the password is sex20. I will not be coming up with ideas for any sessions. Like PodCamp, this is an unconference created by YOU the participants!

Two of the confirmed sessions have detailed descriptions… here they are:

Choose Your Own Adventure: How has the escorting business changed with the advent of the Internet? - Kristi Kane

Thanks to the Internet, certain hit-or-miss aspects of the escorting business are going by the wayside.

For men, this includes: Looking up random escort agencies in the Yellow Pages, and not knowing what they’ll get; Calling an agency, asking for a petite redhead and getting a heavy brunette; Or having the right girl show up, but not performing the advertised service.

For women: Working for an old-school agency and not knowing who they’ll be seeing or where they’ll be going; Having to wear a blonde wig to an appointment because the guy asked for a blonde; Placing ads in alternative weeklies and fielding tons of bizarre calls from undesirable clients; Having to give half of their hard-earned money back to the agency; And worst of all, walking the streets or dealing with pimps.

For girls who don’t mind answering their own phones, doing their own client screening, and of course, doing their own advertising online, the Internet offers not only a more lucrative arena for putting their assets to work, but gives both providers and hobbyists a place to “choose their own adventures.”

Erotic Writing 101 - Rachel Kramer Bussel

Do you have fantasies waiting to be set free? Do you long to tell someone your deepest desires - or invent whole new erotic scenarios?

Just how kinky can (and should) you get? Are you looking for a career in dirty words?

Learn the tricks of the trade, including how to create tension, passion, and dirty talk, incorporate real-life elements into your smut as well as write from the POV of other genders/sexual orientations, along with erotic writing for big bucks. Taught by acclaimed author and editor Rachel Kramer Bussel (rachelkramerbussel.com), contributor to over 100 anthologies, including Best American Erotica 2004 and 2006. Workshop will cover basics of erotic writing, pseudonyms, sensual letter writing for lovers, writing for websites, magazines and anthologies, how and where to submit your work, as well as exercises to practice in class and at home. Rachel has edited over a dozen naughty books, including He’s on Top, She’s on Top, Caught Looking, Ultimate Undies, and Naughty Spanking Stories from A to Z 1 and 2, is Senior Editor at Penthouse Variations and a Contributing Editor at Penthouse, and hosts NYC’s monthly In The Flesh Erotic Reading Series.

And please add a Sex 2.0 badge to your blog or web site!

Note to self: Stop being such a cheapskate and order more MOO cards. I couldn’t send nearly as many as I wanted to Dacia, Rachel, and Regina. I need to keep reminding myself that yes, in fact, it is okay to spend money on things that aren’t “essential.” :P

On that note, here’s a note to everyone: Feel free to make your own MOO cards, ’cause the logo is on Flickr for everyone’s Creative Commons-friendly use.

It’s official:

Now, I need someone to help out by making small badges for people’s sidebars and such. You know how there are always “I’m going” badges for different conferences (like the ones in my sidebar right now for BlogHer)? Well, we need something like that… except - wait for the brilliance! - instead of “I’m going” it needs to say “I’m coming.” Har har! Get it??

No, in fact, Sex 2.0 is not all academic and super-serious. In fact, it’s pretty damn silly and loaded with bad puns.

Big thanks to Laura Ross, who has been coming up with some amazing potential logos for Sex 2.0. She has been posting them to the Google group and we’ve had some lively discussion about the merits of each design; but the conversation ebbs and flows and is currently in an “ebb” stage, and we need to decide on a logo soon, so that we can move forward with planning.

So! I’m posting the four logos that have gotten the most favorable responses here, for anyone and everyone to vote on.

Colors are changeable, so don’t worry about that stuff so much as the actual design itself. Share your opinions in the comments. Ideally I would like to have determined which one we’re going to use by the end of next week.

1) Lips:

2) Handprints:

3) Mask:

4) Pole:

If you’re at all interested in Sex 2.0, please join the Google group. Help make this unconference what you want it to be!

Update: As I mentioned here, and have mentioned previously on the Google group, anyone should feel free to come up with your own logo designs for consideration. It’s an unconference, after all!

There’s so much I want to say, but I feel a bit overwhelmed. I’m not sure where to start!

I guess I’ll start by directing you to the PodCamp Atlanta media page, where you can find links to all podcasts, vidcasts, etc. from PodCamp Atlanta. The page will be updated constantly as new stuff is posted. Click the Flickr and Technorati links to see photos and read blog posts. There’s also a link to Google News, where you can see all the MSM outlets that picked up the AP story.

Oh, and on Sunday, “podcamp atlanta” was the 8th most popular search term on Technorati! Woohoo!

Well, since I can’t think of some profound way to launch into the “Here’s what I learned…” homily, I’ll just do a bulleted list:

Stuff I learned / take-aways for next year

• Length of sessions should be variable depending on the topic (anywhere from 45 minutes to 90 minutes), and there should be padding in between sessions.
• Prize drawing: The tickets were kind of a PITA. We should do it differently next year, but I’m not sure how yet. (Just draw people’s names, maybe? Put each session leader in charge of one or more prizes?)
• People didn’t drink nearly as much coffee on Sunday morning. No idea why.
• Sponsorships: I’m thinking the best way to handle it might be how ConvergeSouth is handling it this year… have a set of items and let potential sponsors pick which ones they want to sponsor, rather than waiting around for them to toss $50 at you. Individuals, smaller businesses, etc. could make donations in any amount as a “friend of PodCamp” or something. But, on the other hand, I also like the idea of having different “levels” of sponsorship, like PodCamp NYC and some other uncons. So, I’m not sure about that yet.
• Paypal and other money lessons… basically, let whoever the money’s going to (in this case, Elemental Interactive) pay whenever possible, instead of writing a bunch of checks back and forth. I bet my bank thinks I’m laundering money by now.
• Let’s not have it on St. Patrick’s Day again if we can help it. (We couldn’t help it this time.)
• I didn’t know it would be such an emotional rollercoaster!! Next year I would like to start planning a little earlier, and enlist the help of more people (that is, delegate more stuff rather than trying to do so much of it myself). Delegating has always been hard for me, but I know it’s necessary, because when I don’t delegate enough, the emotional toll on me is too high.

What was a smashing success:

Really, overall I think the whole weekend was a success, but here are a few particular things…

• Friday night pre-party at Manuel’s was awesome! There were so many people there, and it was just a damn good time!
• People really liked the lunch both days. This makes me happy, because I have to admit I was a little worried about the catering situation. We didn’t have much choice in which caterer to use, since the venue had an “approved caterer.” They were pretty expensive and this led to some stress on my part that we’d end up in the red - and I’m still not sure whether or not we did. But the food was great, and the caterers were prompt, professional, and made sure everything was just right.
• The diversity of the crowd was great! I am really happy about that. And, next time, I would like to have even more topical sessions (e.g. queercasting).
• Thanks to Sam Chupp for stepping in for Rob Safuto, who was stuck in Newark due to bad weather, to lead the “Podcasting on a Budget” session! Hopefully Rob will be able to make it next year.

General notes / questions / pondering

• The most common complaint was that the wifi was flakey. All I have to say about that is, “eh.” I think the minor inconvenience of the network apparently having some kind of load capacity was well worth the trade-off of having the event in such a nice venue. (And I would love to have it in the Miller-Ward again next year, if they’ll have us back!) I’ve been to paid conferences where the wifi was even flakier, so I can’t really get too worked up about it. People can deal.
• Someone suggested having music. We tried but weren’t able to get anybody to do it in time. Planning ahead and delegating should take care of this next year. I’d like to assign this out to someone like Heather, Cable and Tweed, or someone else who is more “plugged in” to the local music scene than I am.
• There was a minor kerfluffle with the guy with the dog, but we seem to have sorted it out in the relative public space of his blog. Talk about stuff we never in a million years expected, much less planned for! I guess there’s always something.
• A lot of people are still trying to grasp the unconference concept. Len Witt did the right thing by taking the reins and making something happen instead of just complaining about it. Also if people want hands-on stuff, it’s their responsibility to schedule it ahead of time.
• Shelby says there were too many sales pitches. I don’t know, because I wasn’t in all of the sessions. Sales pitches at unconferences annoy the shit out of me, as I mentioned when I wrote about BlogSavannah and probably a few other times. But how to prevent this? Thoughts? Here’s what I wrote on Shelby’s blog:
  

  In the opening remarks on Sat. I said that thing about, “if someone is saying something crazy, it’s your responsibility to grab the mic and put a stop to it” - or whatever it was I said. I meant to also say, “No selling!” - but I forgot. Anyway, the beauty and the sometimes annoying thing about unconferences is that it really drives home the point that you can’t control what other people do.

• Finally: I love coming together with people like this and having fun. Sunday lunch was my favorite part of the whole weekend, because people were sitting around eating, talking, and laughing - A LOT! Quote of the weekend, from Penny: “It’s called social media for a reason.”

I’m sure there’s something I’m forgetting, but this is long enough already.

Actually, one last thing… the emotional rollercoaster aspect of it all has triggered some of those “OH WHY ARE WE HERE” crap moments again… bleh. Then I get carried away and start worrying about death and it just gets waaaaay too emo to handle. So, I’m trying to remember what Steve Eley always says at the end of a conversation, and how he signs all his emails: “Have fun!” I am going to make that my mantra. Because really, that’s what it’s all about.

Technorati: podcampatlanta

Rusty and I are going to be jet-setting podcasters this year - because, why the hell not? Here are some events we’ll be gracing with our presence:

PodCamp NYC

April 6-7, 2007

New York, NY

BlogHer ‘07

July 27-28, 2007

Chicago, IL

Podcast and New Media Expo

Sept. 28-30, 2007

Ontario, CA

…and maybe more! But this is what we know for sure.

In New York we’ll be staying with the lovely and talented Dacia; it’ll be great to see her again and I’m glad she and Rusty will finally be able to meet. And I’m excited about going to Chicago and California (Ontario is near LA, if I remember correctly) because I’ve never been to either place.

But before all that, I have to finish pulling PodCamp Atlanta out of my ass… if you haven’t signed up yet, you’d better hurry up and do it, because space is going fast.

Well, it was a jam-packed weekend! Where to begin. Rusty and I had a blast at BlogSavannah. A lot of the sessions were centered around the intersection of blogging and business, or blogging and mainstream media. Those were interesting but also at times infuriating, especially when one person kept trying to dominate the conversation (clearly some people don’t understand the concept of an unconference!). The Women and Blogging session was good except some of the people kept trying to derail it, and I was just sitting there in awe wondering what the hell crawled up their ass and died. This one woman kept accusing Gennie (the session leader) of “not being honest” because she cusses on her blog but doesn’t cuss in front of her son IRL. She wouldn’t let it go… she said it like 5 times and then was like, “But, you don’t have to defend yourself.” WTF?? Oh, I’m just going to rake you over the coals; but no, it’s not like I’m asking you to defend your choices. I wanted to really go at it with her but I didn’t want to take the session even further off the rails. Also, a lot of the people were really big about “if you blog and you get fired it’s your own damn fault, employers can do whatever they want and you don’t get to complain or have an opinion!!” That floored me as well. Oh, and then, the best, was when this one woman said something like, “If you work nights as a stripper, of course you should get fired from your day job.” Oh lord, how I wanted to tear her a new asshole. But, again, didn’t want to derail. Instead I just looked daggers at her and said I didn’t see why that mattered. Also I called Drew out for not letting the women speak at the Women and Blogging session; with any luck you’ll hear that on the forthcoming podcast. Look, it’s nothing against him personally; I think he did an amazing job organizing this whole thing, and I will surely be sending him a bunch of emails picking his brain for nuggets of wisdom I can apply to PodCamp. But, if you’re a man in a session called Women and Blogging, and you start trying to dominate the conversation, well, I’m going to call you out on it, because that’s some shit and you need to recognize that you don’t get to dominate every single conversation.

Oops, I just realized that I’d been writing in one big long paragraph. Sorry… it kind of reflects my train of thought at the moment though, as I only have a brief window of time here at work to write this. So if this recap is somewhat jumbled, that’s why. Anyway, overall, BlogSavannah was awesome, we had a lot of fun, and met some really smart, interesting people. Oh, and thank goodness we were with Phil after dinner Saturday night, when we discovered our car had been locked in a parking garage. :P He tracked down the person with the keys for us! My BlogSavannah photos are on Flickr, along with about 250 more in the group pool. (I’ll post more photos soon.) Sherry has good coverage of a lot of the sessions.

Moving on… Saturday morning we drove to Vidalia to meet with Wilson Smith of What Is Goin’ On? It was great to finally meet him in person, and Vidalia appears to be a quintessential Southern small town. After our super-secret meeting of which I can reveal no more, Rusty and I were off to Andersonville for an investigation with the Henry County Ghost Hunters. Yep, we got full access to the prison site and cemetery, and spent about four hours wandering around with digiral recorders and flashlights. We got scared at one point by what we thought was a ghost, but it turned out just to be a possum. Anyway, soon there will be a podcast up from that night, and hopefully it’ll include some EVPs!

Also, podcasts from BlogSavannah will also be up in the next week or so… we’re going to start a GAPN network program called (Un)ConCasts where people can put recordings from any conferences they go to. In the foreseeable future we’ll be posting stuff from BlogSavannah, SoCon07, PodCamp Atlanta, and further down the line, Dragon*Con and ConvergeSouth 2007.

Okay, that’s all for now… gotta get back to work. Maybe later this week I’ll actually catch up on reading blogs. At the moment I’m avoiding eye contact with my BlogLines account. BlogSavannah