Being Amber Rhea

Short performance by Sadie Lune, explaining why sex workers’ rights are important.

Via Melissa.

The papers print his picture almost everywhere he goes:
Richard Cory at the opera, Richard Cory at a show.
And the rumor of his parties and the orgies on his yacht!
He surely must be happy with everything he’s got.

FEATURING: LAKARA FOSTER

PERFORMANCES BY: POLELATEAZ * BLAKKAUFI * MS. VAGINA JENKINS * YOLO AKILI * KEN J MARTIN * DJ MARK ANGEL * MS. STEWART * ENTANGLEMENT CIRCUS * N2 PASSION * DJ CHA CHA JONES * MILLICENT M. JOHNNIE * ESHE SAKURA * JENNY BUNNS YOUNG * KERESTEN BOOKER

Join us for a sensual night free of sexual oppression for all of us fighting for the freedom of our bodies everyday. Celebrate your authentic self at our Anti-Masquerade Ball with live performances, delectable desserts, fabulous prizes, a live auction and more!

October 2, 2008 at The Park Tavern, 500 10th Street NE, Atlanta, GA 30309 (on MARTA Route 45!)
Doors open at 7pm. Show begins at 8pm.

Advance Tickets - Suggested Donation: $20
Tickets at the Door - Suggested Donation: $25
**No one will be turned away for lack of funds; sliding scale tickets only accepted at the door.

RAFFLE:

• GRAND PRIZE: 3 Day - 2 Night Cruise for 2 to the Bahamas or Mexico–your choice! ~ Meghan Elliott, travel consultant for World Ventures.
• Two $100 Gas Cards.

LIVE AUCTION:

• Self-Love Date: Enjoy a night in with the Bunny Love Kit. Courtesy of Babeland.
• PoleLaTeaz Dates: 3 free classes for the winner and a friend at the PoleLaTeaz studio, plus an extra $100 gift certificate! Courtesy of PoleLaTeaz.
• Chocolate Pink Gift Certificate
• Sutra Lounge VIP Lounge for 30, worth $1,500.

All proceeds benefit SPARK and Project South. Can’t make it? Donate a ticket, buy some raffle tickets or make a general donation to support SPARK & Project South’s work!

Contact mia@sparkrj.org or call 404-532-0022 for more information and check our Evite for the latest updates! You do not have to be present to win prizes!

Buy your tickets here.

I’ve posted it before, but it is, by far, the most appropriate song I can think of for today.

“Yeah, that has nothing to do with drugs. That’s the chemicals in your mind.”

When I was in Augusta last weekend, my mom dug out a tape from the 80s where she’d recorded some things of familial significance. I hadn’t watched it in years, but when I saw it, I knew immediately that this stuff would have to go on YouTube.

First up is my 30 seconds of fame on local television in 1986 (or it might have been 1987; I can’t remember for sure). My parents knew the guy who owned this piano shop and he asked us to be in a commercial. I remember we did several takes. I also remember complaining to my mom that I was too old to say “Mommy” and “Daddy,” and she explained to me that actors and actresses often play characters who are younger. That satisfied me.

Next is an Augusta local news segment from the mid 80s. My parents are in the B-roll of Maxwell’s for a few seconds toward the very end, around the 1:04 mark. It’s funny for a number of obvious reasons (80s hair, 80s attire, etc.) but also because it shows just how little local news has changed in the past 20 years.

Finally, my dad’s winning chicken recipe. Wait, let me explain: In the 80s, “Midday on 12″ was a program that came on at noon on Channel 12 in Augusta. They had a segment called “Lookin’ at Cookin’” where viewers could submit recipes, and a winner was chosen each month. My dad’s honey-baked chicken recipe was the winner one month in 1984. He won a set of really cheap pots that we ended up giving away to someone.

Aside: I love these two ladies’ Southern accents!

I also want to give a plug for Affordable Video Solutions on W. Peachtree. Originally we were going to digitize the video at home, because Rusty has one of those converter boxes to connect the VCR to his computer. But our VCR tried to eat the tape. So we took it to AVS and they fixed the tape (it wasn’t actually damaged; they just had to wind it back into the housing) and converted it to DVD. They were very friendly and fast, and the price for the conversion was $29.95. I definitely recommend them if you need anything like that.

ETA: Ha, the chicken recipe video is already the top hit on Google for "midday on 12" augusta.

A classic from my teenage years! (Longer post coming later on music and messaging from the 90s, inspired by Sarah and thoughts that have been percolating for a while.)

I can’t do nothin’, girl, without somebody buggin’
I used to think that it was me, but now I see it wasn’t
They told me to change, they called me names, and so I popped one
Opinions are like assholes and everybody’s got one

In honor of the fourth anniversary of my divorce:

(And, honestly… I won’t always post Liz Phair songs!)

Just because.
(This time from Under the Pink.)

Father says bow your head
Like the Good Book says
Well I think the Good Book is missing some pages
Gonna lay down
Gonna lay down
And when my hand touches myself
I can finally rest my head
And when they say take of his body
I think I’ll take from mine instead

I downloaded Little Earthquakes tonight. I have the cassette somewhere, but I’m not going to take the time to find it and then try to import it to my computer somehow. Lots of memories coming back… it’s weird (and it sounds cliché and emo to say) how music can hold so many visceral memories, much like certain scents.

He said you’re really an ugly girl
But I like the way you play
And I died
But I thanked him
Can you believe that
Sick, sick
Holding on to his picture
Dressing up every day

I got something to say you know
But nothing comes
Yes I know what you think of me
You never shut up
Yeah I can hear that

But what if I’m a mermaid
In these jeans of his
With her name still on it
Hey but I don’t care
‘Cause sometimes
I said sometimes
I hear my voice
And it’s been here
Silent all these years

Big bag of win:

[Via, in order of places I saw it: Feministing, Racialicious, Drifting Through the Grift, and Grabbingsand]

Each is relevant for a different reason, and viscerally reminiscent of a particular time in my life.

“Chopsticks” - Liz Phair

I met him at a party and he told me how to drive him home
He said he liked to do it backwards
I said, “That’s just fine with me,
That way we can fuck and watch TV.”

It was four a.m. and the light was gray, like it always is in paperbacks
He asked if I liked playing jacks
I told him that I was good to sixes
But all hell broke loose after that

I told him that I knew Julia Roberts when I was twelve at summer camp
We didn’t say anything after that
I dropped him off and I drove on home
‘Cause secretly I’m timid

“Fool’s Gold” - Bree Sharp

My head is heavy and bent like a crane
The wrecking ball blues are coming again
And Latham says, “Babe, you know life is a ride”
But living’s no fun when you’re dead inside.

I pierce myself to wake up my veins
I’d pierce my heart if I thought things would change
I’m just like a skin that’s been stung and restung
The campfire songs that are sung and resung
For a girl of my age why am I so numb?

I’ve been chasing a lie I was sold
Running down thieves and fool’s gold
These Christmas dreams are just painted coal

I’ve been swallowed up by greed, I’ve been spat upon by lust
If they ain’t playing with your money, they’re playing with your trust
And I’m trying so hard to stop sitting still
To gather the juice that’s been spent or been spilled
Find a spark in myself that hasn’t been killed
‘Cause if death doesn’t get you, then life surely will.

I’ve been chasing a lie I was sold
Running down thieves and fool’s gold
And these Christmas dreams are just painted–

We’ve been chasing a lie we were sold
We’re running down thieves and fool’s gold
And these Christmas dreams are just painted
Just painted, just painted, just painted
Coal

Talk about an early frost.

(Couldn’t find a video for this one.)

Carry on.

Excellent video:

Please repost!

(Via Derek.)

Ren has been using this online tool called Animoto. Seeing the cool stuff she’s done with it, I feel like I should give it a whirl! Now I just have to think of what to make a video about. In the meantime, check out this excellent sex workers’ rights video Ren made:

I had those Mr. Men books as a kid. I noticed that in this video, Mr. Contrarian corresponds to the original Mr. Stingy.

[Via Feministe]

This is an updated video, a follow-up to the one I posted yesterday. Watch it!

[Via Pro-Porn Activism]

Nina Hartley speaks the truth here.*

And to me it seems like common sense. I honestly cannot wrap my brain around what is so fucking difficult about this concept for so many legions of people. Some basic concepts here… 1) Sex workers are people. 2) If you want to help someone, the best way to help them is to first ask them what they need.

How is this not the most obvious thing ever? But I guess if you never even get to point #1, that makes point #2 downright unattainable.

Nina nails it, but the comments on YouTube are depressing and enraging as hell. I didn’t want to look. I knew they’d be a vat of toxic stew. But as I was looking for the embed code, my eyes drifted down the page and… well, it made me want to cry.

There’s been a lot of bullshit in my life lately. And when I see that kind of shit, it just makes me feel awful, to realize (again) that this is what a lot of people think. Yeah, you can say the internet brings out the dregs of humanity, and sure, that’s true in some cases. But so many people of all walks of life have these horrible ideas about sex workers… it’s NORMAL to think these things. That doesn’t make it okay. But it means that most people I encounter on a daily basis are harboring these thoughts, and that bothers me to know end and certainly contributes to my general wariness and lack of trust around people I don’t know very well.

It’s also happened that people have seemed to agree with me to my face, and then later I find out the awful shit they were saying when I wasn’t there, about sex workers, the sex industry, etc. It really makes me want to sever ties (and in some cases I have).

Anyway. Also, what Ren said:

And that is going to lead us right here: What is the plan, anyway? You know, a lot of us are taking hits for saying “The sex industry? It’s not going anywhere, so let’s work for harm reduction and getting those who want out the help they need, and leave those who want in alone…” So yeah…what is the Amazing, Super Secret Plan to Rid the World of the Sex Industry? We’re dying (figuratively and literally) to know. In the mean time, what with all the talk of not allowing it to be normalized, without ever accepting it as work, without ever giving sex workers any sort of legal status and voice…well, women are being abused, raped, killed, dehumanized, and marginalized. So I ask, in the quest to end the sex industry, are you willing to sacrifice the women working in it here and now to reach that goal…if it is even attainable? That is a question I’d really like to have answered, yet I suspect, such an answer will never come. My answer to that is obvious. No. I’m not. Especially when “the Plan” is never revealed, hence my support of harm reduction, programs for those who want out, aid, workplace safety, and why yes, decriminalization.

* Via Bound, Not Gagged.

From the perennially awesome folks at SPARK! Reproductive Justice Now (formerly Georgians for Choice) comes a video about stupid HB526:

So far there’s only one comment on the YouTube page (let’s fix that) and it’s from some fool who says the following:

What is wrong with the state giving back parental rights to parents? It is not up to a clinic to decide how to raise and protect our children.

Right, because it’s up to the government to decide how to raise and protect our children.

…GriftDrift or Sara, this post could be known as “Songs In My Head” or “Mood Music.”

At first I figured I’d look for the best concert footage to post, but then this video showed up in the YouTube search. It honestly had not occurred to me to look for an actual music video, ya know, like the kind they show on Em-Tee-Vee. (Do they show those anymore? Back when I stopped watching MTV, they were down to about three hours a day of music videos.) Am I showing my age? I mean, I’m not all that old, but I haven’t watched MTV or had any interest whatsoever in music videos in over ten years.

Anyway, back to Heimdalsgate, apparently some people think the song is about drugs. That’s also something that hadn’t occurred to me, but Wikipedia says it’s a common perception. To me it was just so obvious that it’s about depression, that I never considered anything else. I guess people who haven’t experienced depression don’t identify with it. Here’s what Kevin said to some idiotic-sounding reporter from The Stranger:

I went through this chemical depression, and that’s when I was writing a lot of the songs for Hissing Fauna. They’re all songs about that experience. And I was experiencing it in the moment that I was writing the songs, and sort of asking myself: What the hell is going on? Why are you all of a sudden totally paranoid and plagued by these anxieties? And why is everything so distorted and confusing and fucked up? My lifestyle hadn’t changed that much. And then I realized, well, there’s something going on inside of me that I don’t have control over, and then you realize how vulnerable you are to these things, these elements that you can’t understand, or unless you go on medication and get it under control. It’s like you’re being betrayed by your body.

I love this song. I love the whole album (except for one annoying song).

Meanwhile, there are storms throughout the South today, and already 45 people have been killed by tornadoes. :( I’m supposed to go see my new shrink at noon; hopefully the weather won’t be too terrible.

The new issue of Creative Loafing is out, and they didn’t run my letter to the editor. (I had gotten an email from someone on their staff saying they might run it, which is why I waited before posting anything here.) So here it is. Later I might do a follow-up post where I expand on some of the points and include some other points that I had to cut out in order to keep it around 500 words.

—

I’m writing to express my disappointment with the 1.16.08 feature, “One man’s battle against Midtown prostitutes and their johns,” by Andisheh Nouraee.

There are two separate matters here. The first, and most obvious, is that Gower and Denby are dangerous vigilantes. I am glad that their deplorable tactics are being exposed.

It should go without saying that posting videos of sex workers on YouTube is a horrible idea. What is the goal? Sex workers - especially street prostitutes - are disproportionately the targets of violent crime. Violent criminals target sex workers because they know they can get away with it. (In fact, this was the exact justification given by Gary Ridgway, who was convicted of the murders of over 40 prostitutes.) Gower’s dehumanization of sex workers through his behavior and language perpetuates the cultural mores that make such violence acceptable.

But I am also disappointed with Nouraee’s treatment of the issue. Nouraee learned about Gower’s harassment of street workers at an event I helped organize at Charis Books, commemorating the 5th annual International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers. After the program, he spoke with the other two organizers and me and expressed interest in learning more and possibly doing a story.

Nouraee sat through our program that night and listened as people recounted individual encounters with Gower, citing Gower’s blatant homophobia and transphobia. He listened as we discussed the glaring absence of sex workers’ voices in the media, as well as the fact that when sex workers are mentioned in the media, they are either troublemakers or victims - in other words, they’re not people; they’re useful objects in making a point and reinforcing a stereotype.

He spoke with several sex workers that night and a few weeks later, while doing research for this story. He expressed concern about making sure to include sex workers’ voices.

If Nouraee tried to speak with street prostitutes in Midtown and they did not want to speak to him, he could have mentioned it in the article. Reporters do this all the time (”so-and-so declined to comment”). If that were the case, he could also reflect on why sex workers might be wary of talking to a reporter. Could it be because they’re tired of having their words (and existence) twisted to fit whatever agenda is at hand?

Nouraee fails as an investigative reporter with this piece, especially as one for a paper that claims to be alternative. Terms like “transvestitute” and “real female” go unchallenged and uncorrected. Nouraee does not probe Gower about why Gower is so fixated on harassing prostitutes. He does not examine how the criminalization of prostitution perpetuates the violence that many people associate with street prostitution. He does not discuss the societal and economic conditions that lead to many transpeople working on the streets.

For people who are interested in learning more about sex workers’ rights activism, some good sources of information are SWOP-USA, Desiree Alliance, COYOTE and $pread Magazine.

Even though I’ve never had a problem with being photographed (really I had no choice, my mom was a shutterbug who was posing me for photos practically from the day I was born), and podcasting has eroded any apprehension I once felt about hearing my own voice, I still get all weird and self-conscious about being on video. And yet, here I am, as a podcasting “pro” in the latest episode of The Squadcast.

Thanks to Grant and Christina for inviting me on!

Via Hobo Stripper, I found this video of the winner Miss Poledance Australia 2006:

On an only vaguely related note, last night Rusty and I went to Little Wings, another Atlanta swinger’s club. It was formerly Velvet Heaven and recently re-opened under new management. All in all the place did not suck, although I think Trapeze still gets top marks because of the layout and the kick-ass buffet.

Anyway, they had two poles, and I danced twice. The second time, I almost lost my shoe, but I wasn’t embarrassed - happily, I’m past being embarrassed about that kind of thing. I did scrape up my left knee a little, because they had this weird itchy carpet on the stage. I couldn’t do as many moves as I would’ve liked, because the poles were painted, making them difficult to grasp. But I think I did pretty well! Also, there was a guy in a cape and devil horns who pole danced several times, and he was really good. I wondered if he was a male stripper. (See, men pole dance too - for those of you who, for whatever unknown reason, judge an activity’s merit based on whether men do it.)

Another episode of Off The Bus has landed! This one was filmed at the Fred Thompson support meeting/rally(?) last week. Rusty and I actually went, so that Grayson wouldn’t be all alone and because we had a kind of morbid curiosity about how the other side lives. We make quick cameo appearances toward the beginning of the video.

Looking forward to episode 3!